My Poor Car has Died

So I was driving my poor old car the other day, and it starting making pretty weird noises like this:

*BANG!*  brrm, brrm, brrm *BANG!*

brrm *BANG!* brrm, brrm, brrm *faaark!* *BANG!*

Ok, the last bit was me, not the car, but you get the idea.  Basically it was really disconcerting, especially since it was about 10.30 at night and with every loud *BANG* there was an accompanying jolt to the undercarriage of the car –  kind of like when you accidentally run over the yellow concrete pile-ons when pulling into parking spaces.

like you’ve never done that.

Anyway, all the banging and the jolting and the loss of steering wound the poor, long suffering vehicle into the mechanic shop.  Two days later he called me with the news:

“it’s dead”.

Well, what he actually said was something gear box, blah, blah, difsomething or other, blah blah, $1,000, but what he really meant was,

it’s dead.

It is a sad day.  Piece of shit that it is, it was my piece of shit, and for the last five years it has gritted it’s teeth through it’s peeling paint, bungy cord, leaking door seals, balding tires and my refusal to ever wash it, and driven me anywhere and everywhere, I asked it to every, single time I wanted it to.

I have driven it into the ground, which I always said I would do, and which, in my opinion, is the best way for a car to go.  That little car has much to be proud of.  So rest in piece(s) little car, you were a good friend and will not be forgotten.

so – anyone know where I can get me a sweet new thang that looks more like this?* 

*Note:  Have only $400.  Call me.

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